Am I being fair in thinking I should be first with my wife also?

There has to be a healthy balance. Yes, your spouse should be placed at the top of the list of priorities and who you go to when you need someone. A marriage should be a tight team partnership where the couple works together and is always there for each other like no other. BUT, they also have to be able to have other friends and interests outside of the marriage. They should be encouraged to do this! She was not out of line by visiting with other people at the game. Some other night she might not have been as busy, but this is the night you thought about it because you'd just read that email (which sounds pretty cool by the way, I might see if the hubby wants to sign up for that). It does seem like she should take a little more time to make you feel loved and important to her. But she needs to be free to talk to other people.